I've been getting a lot of feedback from y'all pointing out some "inconsistencies" with my point of view. Been getting a lot of suck-ass questions. So I'm gonna come right out and answer them. You hear me, assholes, I'm gonna do it right now.
Question: How are you writing a blog? You died in 1973...
Answer: How are you talking so articulately to me with my foot up your ass and my thumb on your tongue? Word.
Question: Aren't you an evil evil man? Why should we pay attention to you?
Answer: Thought leadership. 'Nuff said.
Question: Okay, you're a Latin American dictator who was ousted in 1959 and died in '73, so my first question is how are you writing about the New York Senate coup, and my second question is why do you write as if you're a sassy black woman?
Answer: Alright, sugar, you caught me. Let me come clear with y'all. My name is Fulgencio Batista, that's a sassy name, and my sass has lived on posthumously on the internets so I can comment on whatever the hell I want to. No one ever heard the last of Batista. Also, I talk like this because I ain't gonna let no one bring me down.
That coup is for retardos.